Well 5/22 is my missing pieces birthday so I've decided tonight's blog will be for her.
Its been less the 2 years since she has come into my life. From the beginning of our facebook adds, we clicked. She instantly was my best friend. On bad days she was there to tell me to get my shit together. On good days she was there to laugh with me. For MONTHS we spent every day texting, talking on the phone, or Facebook tagging each other in funny shit. On days I felt alone she was there to remind me that even if no one was physically there by me, she was still with me. During my broken heart moments, during my anger for my kids, during fights with my mom or sister, My Titi was always there. Never a doubt that if I needed her, she was only a call or text away.
We quickly decided that we would build a bridge that our parents never did, and quiet honestly, that was probably for the best. We began a Christmas tradition of sending each other personalized cousin ornaments for our trees, She sent the first one and last year I sent hers.
The first time I ever remember laying eyes on her will be a day I never forget. I had some "issues" with her boyfriend at the time and was pretty relentless with him. Every time he would post something cute on her facebook, I would just simply say "no". Anytime one of them posted that they were doing something together , another NO was added to the feed. But a few weeks before they came to Kansas to see me and the effing ball of twine, Trudy had asked me for ideas for mothers day. I made some random suggestions as Titi had been very serious that she would never get married again. Trudy decided on a stunning watch and my opinion was changing. While there were things that had happened that made me mad(anything that makes her anything less then the happiest woman in Texas makes me mad, just for the record), I could see that he loved her and he was at least trying. I got a picture of the watch before she got it and I knew instantly she would love it, because I did, and well... we're kinda the same people. haha a few weeks later, here Trudy came with more questions on what to get her for her birthday. I tried to be so incognito but was asking questions. She said something that she hadn't told anyone and that was a game changer for me...she said "he bought me a truck to get us to Kansas to see you, and that's all I need. I have everything I want and one day I'll have his last name" There it was.... a confession. It was the moment that I knew not only was she happier then shes ever been, but that I had to make that happen. Sure enough, Trudy pulled through and they were engaged that day.
To most people, that's just a cute love story. To most of you, that is just a memory I have of my cousin and her now husband, but its so much more to me. It was significant part of our relationship. I was there when she was crying her heart out, I was there when she made stupid choices, I was there to laugh with her, to be angry with her, and to help her plot against those who were causing her heartache(you can laugh, but those plots were serious.) . I was there when her son was being tested for a condition that could have changed their lives, I was there in her dark moments....but that isn't what I remember the most. What I remember the most was her telling me when I was being a hard headed bitch. She never faltered in the roll as my cousin, my best friend, my missing piece.
During their trip to Kansas we had more fun then it made since to have. Even though I was going through some things, Titi and Trudy were there. They made me laugh and they made me thankful they were there. This spring break Scott, the kids and I went to Texas and we did things that I would not have wanted to do with anyone else. Even during a heated discussion she was able to pull me back together so that our time together was not ruined. When we left Texas I cried like a baby. I know Ill see her again, but having a piece of your soul missing is pretty painful.
We shared stories of our childhood with eachother and yet it always felt like we lived it too.
Titi buried her mom at a very young age and yet she never let that define her. She has women in her life that graciously stepped in as her mom and even though she misses her mom everyday, she does not treat them like they are just her step mothers.... they are her mom. This love carries into the way she treats Trudys boys, Joe and Jay! Those boys are just as much a part of her soul as the 2 she gave birth to. I am now in a relationship and he has 3 kids. I strive everyday to love these kids as much as Nikki loves Tudys(ok, those are their real names, but whatever).
So today, Titi, I want you to know that youre still the piece Ive been missing my whole life. You complete my soul. You are an amazing mom, wife, cousin, and friend. I look to you, my old cousin, for guidance and for advise, and as someone I strive to have the characteristics of.
I know Trudy and the kids will make this day special for you because that's the kind of man you married and kids you've raised.
But to you as just simply my best friend, I hope we can share many many many more amazing birthdays "together".
I Love you Letitia Pena! Happy birthday dear cousin!!!!
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Sunday, May 18, 2014
Graduation, ring, and summer vacay
Today the kids and I went to Salina to watch Quintins "big" walk the stage. He'll be going to college in Hays next year, and I feel completely blessed that Quintin had him as a mentor for 2 years. He truly is an angel to us. He knows Quintin is struggling with Scott and so he pointed out to him that the people there for him today, the biggest day of his life so far, was his mom, her dad, and his moms husband. No him and his step dad don't always agree, but he was still there for that moment when his father wasn't. I think it meant a lot for him to hear that from a man he thinks so highly of.
I happened to come across my wedding band today. Yes Ive seen it, yes I knew it was here. I put it on my finger and I felt nothing. I didn't feel the "oh I cant wait to flash this", I didn't feel the "wooohoooo im going to be his wife", and honestly I freaked out for a minute. Then I figured it out. At this point, its just a ring. He didn't put it on my finger, it didn't come with vows, it didn't come with a forever bond as a family....it was just a ring that I put on my finger. Come 10/10/14, when that ring is placed on my finger I suspect ill be crying like a baby! :) Scott is working so many hours to provide for us and make sure we have everything we want that I am just so thankful to have a man who will do anything he can. Love you Baby
This is the last Monday of the school year. After Thursday we will have a sophomore(Katie), 7th grader(Meah), 6th(Ciandra), 5th(Quintin), 4th(Gabe), 3rd(Sam) and Jordann will spend another year at headstart since her birthday is 3 weeks past the cut off date. This is exciting and terrifying all at the same time. This is our first summer as a blended family so trying to figure out the right mix of activities, work, socializing for adults and kids and family time will be pretty interesting and probably pretty stressful but im so excited to be able to hang out with the babies without school to plan around.
Now summer vacation will also wipe out mine and Scotts alone time that we got when he kids were in school. So now is the time we will be challenged to find time for us. To go on dates and to just be us without always being mom and dad too.
and with all this we still have our wedding to plan..... All I got now is ........
LET THE FUN BEGIN :)
I happened to come across my wedding band today. Yes Ive seen it, yes I knew it was here. I put it on my finger and I felt nothing. I didn't feel the "oh I cant wait to flash this", I didn't feel the "wooohoooo im going to be his wife", and honestly I freaked out for a minute. Then I figured it out. At this point, its just a ring. He didn't put it on my finger, it didn't come with vows, it didn't come with a forever bond as a family....it was just a ring that I put on my finger. Come 10/10/14, when that ring is placed on my finger I suspect ill be crying like a baby! :) Scott is working so many hours to provide for us and make sure we have everything we want that I am just so thankful to have a man who will do anything he can. Love you Baby
This is the last Monday of the school year. After Thursday we will have a sophomore(Katie), 7th grader(Meah), 6th(Ciandra), 5th(Quintin), 4th(Gabe), 3rd(Sam) and Jordann will spend another year at headstart since her birthday is 3 weeks past the cut off date. This is exciting and terrifying all at the same time. This is our first summer as a blended family so trying to figure out the right mix of activities, work, socializing for adults and kids and family time will be pretty interesting and probably pretty stressful but im so excited to be able to hang out with the babies without school to plan around.
Now summer vacation will also wipe out mine and Scotts alone time that we got when he kids were in school. So now is the time we will be challenged to find time for us. To go on dates and to just be us without always being mom and dad too.
and with all this we still have our wedding to plan..... All I got now is ........
LET THE FUN BEGIN :)
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Workout, fight and hair
This morning Scott and I were arguing. Nothing major, I was just frustrated about something and was probably way more sensitive about it then I needed to be. That however worked out for me when I got to the gym. I had found something on pinterest for interval treadmill workouts. It however was a bit more advanced then I am but I now have a set time and speed goal. I was able to go 2.7-3.5 for 15 minutes. I would go 3.5 for 3 minutes, then 2.7 for 1. I decided to stop and do a few weights because I could feel my muscle that causes me problems in my back tightening and I didn't want pain to creep up and be in trouble, especially since I had to work today. I then went to do some weights. Worked my inner and outer thighs/glutes, and my stomach muscles. I don't think if I wasn't so mad that my workout would have been as successful. I usually lift minimal on weights since my current goal is to loose inches, not build muscle. But I went a little heavy and as I sit here now I sure feel it in my legs.
Tomorrow I wont get to work out because we are going with Jordanns school to the zoo here in Hutchinson then I work from 1-9.
Tomorrow evening Meah has her last elementary school concert. Bittersweet. Thankfully I already did this once, so I shouldn't be so emotional. LOL Switching schools and her going back into elementary from Middle school was a pretty hard thing for her but she seems to have accepted it and is just ready to move forward. I am hoping I can get out of work at 630 so I can make it to the concert. Ill be pretty irritated if I have to miss it.
My friend Melissa that is doing our hair for the wedding is in hair school(again) lol Well she needed to attempt to do "ethnic hair" so she came over and flat ironed Meahs hair tonight. She did an AMAZING job, And she did it in like 2 hours, that's faster then I do it. For it being her first time ever with that kind of hair, I think she's for sure got the skills to do it very well and make a lot of money doing it(not from Meahs hair, but from other peoples lol) So Meah is all excited that her hair is straight for her concert, so a happy child, makes for a happy momma...... And so does getting my hair colored so that I go back to looking like Im not old enough to be her momma. Melly grabbed 2 different hair colors but I must say, it turned out pretty effing amazing. Ill post some pictures tomorrow when I can flat iron it. Back in our dumb days we use to hang out all the time, act stupid, do each others hair, etc. Im so glad to have her back in my life. Thankfully we have both grown the hell up and are responsible adults. Love this chick.....thank Melly.
Today I hit a wall with Quintin that every parent dreads. Its the "I don't know how to help you" wall. He has been giving his teacher and I a run for our money these last months of school. He is very intelligent. Hes almost too smart for his own good. This causes all kinds of issues, but the one we are dealing with right now is that he refuses to ask for help. He sat and refused to turn in a test today for 45 minutes because he couldn't come up with the answer. Now when I looked at the problem I didn't have any idea what the answer is either haha. I finally convinced him to just pick the one he was closest to and move on. This sent him into tears. He is not a quitter and to him that was quitting. He quit by not having everyone of the answers right. He usually has 100%-95% in every subject and on every assignment, so when that doesn't happen, he feels hes failed. What he doesn't realize is that Im proud of him no matter what. I know he did his absolute best. He tried, and that's all I can expect from him. Instead he had to be removed from his class. IDK what its going to take to get him to not be so hard on himself. While we expect A's in our house because everyone of our children are capable of accomplishing that, we don't expect them to know everything. Math is his favorite subject though and hes working on 6th grade stuff, so hes by no means failed by missing 1 4th grade question.
Tonight we have my other 3 babies here. Ciandra, Gabe and Samantha. Gabe had to come home early because his blood sugar was way too high but its ok now. It seems like at least once a week he is sent home. I wish his school was better able to maintain his blood sugar without having to interrupt his school week. I know having this is hard on him sometimes so I just wish they could help make it a little easier. I didn't get to see Ciandra or Sam today because they were already in bed when I got home, but Im sure hoping to get in some time with them tomorrow. I saw Gabe for a few minutes tonight because he was just getting out of the shower from baseball practice when I got home. Him and Quintin are on the same team and Scott is their assistant coach. hehe he swore he wouldn't coach when I tried talking him into it at soccer time. :D
Days like today when my day was full and my brain wants to overthink things at 1130 at night, Im thankful that my cousin suggested this.... although I guess my funny side hasn't shown much on here....im sure its coming.
Before I go I want to share the funny moment with Jordann today that I want to make sure I keep forever. There was a lady leaving her school this morning who looked like a hot mess, clothes way too small with way too much fat hanging out, hair looked like a mess, just in general someone that I wanted to say "um, you just brought your child to school, think you could cover up?" but as Jordann saw this lady she looked up at me with this look like "do you see that?" then looked at the ground with her little smirk on her face and shook her head. Shes proving everyday just how much she is my child. She also proving how much she's growing up because months ago she would have blurted out like any toddler would have about what is she wearing, or why didn't she get dressed etc. awwww my baby hahaha
love and thoughts with yall
Tomorrow I wont get to work out because we are going with Jordanns school to the zoo here in Hutchinson then I work from 1-9.
Tomorrow evening Meah has her last elementary school concert. Bittersweet. Thankfully I already did this once, so I shouldn't be so emotional. LOL Switching schools and her going back into elementary from Middle school was a pretty hard thing for her but she seems to have accepted it and is just ready to move forward. I am hoping I can get out of work at 630 so I can make it to the concert. Ill be pretty irritated if I have to miss it.
My friend Melissa that is doing our hair for the wedding is in hair school(again) lol Well she needed to attempt to do "ethnic hair" so she came over and flat ironed Meahs hair tonight. She did an AMAZING job, And she did it in like 2 hours, that's faster then I do it. For it being her first time ever with that kind of hair, I think she's for sure got the skills to do it very well and make a lot of money doing it(not from Meahs hair, but from other peoples lol) So Meah is all excited that her hair is straight for her concert, so a happy child, makes for a happy momma...... And so does getting my hair colored so that I go back to looking like Im not old enough to be her momma. Melly grabbed 2 different hair colors but I must say, it turned out pretty effing amazing. Ill post some pictures tomorrow when I can flat iron it. Back in our dumb days we use to hang out all the time, act stupid, do each others hair, etc. Im so glad to have her back in my life. Thankfully we have both grown the hell up and are responsible adults. Love this chick.....thank Melly.
Today I hit a wall with Quintin that every parent dreads. Its the "I don't know how to help you" wall. He has been giving his teacher and I a run for our money these last months of school. He is very intelligent. Hes almost too smart for his own good. This causes all kinds of issues, but the one we are dealing with right now is that he refuses to ask for help. He sat and refused to turn in a test today for 45 minutes because he couldn't come up with the answer. Now when I looked at the problem I didn't have any idea what the answer is either haha. I finally convinced him to just pick the one he was closest to and move on. This sent him into tears. He is not a quitter and to him that was quitting. He quit by not having everyone of the answers right. He usually has 100%-95% in every subject and on every assignment, so when that doesn't happen, he feels hes failed. What he doesn't realize is that Im proud of him no matter what. I know he did his absolute best. He tried, and that's all I can expect from him. Instead he had to be removed from his class. IDK what its going to take to get him to not be so hard on himself. While we expect A's in our house because everyone of our children are capable of accomplishing that, we don't expect them to know everything. Math is his favorite subject though and hes working on 6th grade stuff, so hes by no means failed by missing 1 4th grade question.
Tonight we have my other 3 babies here. Ciandra, Gabe and Samantha. Gabe had to come home early because his blood sugar was way too high but its ok now. It seems like at least once a week he is sent home. I wish his school was better able to maintain his blood sugar without having to interrupt his school week. I know having this is hard on him sometimes so I just wish they could help make it a little easier. I didn't get to see Ciandra or Sam today because they were already in bed when I got home, but Im sure hoping to get in some time with them tomorrow. I saw Gabe for a few minutes tonight because he was just getting out of the shower from baseball practice when I got home. Him and Quintin are on the same team and Scott is their assistant coach. hehe he swore he wouldn't coach when I tried talking him into it at soccer time. :D
Days like today when my day was full and my brain wants to overthink things at 1130 at night, Im thankful that my cousin suggested this.... although I guess my funny side hasn't shown much on here....im sure its coming.
Before I go I want to share the funny moment with Jordann today that I want to make sure I keep forever. There was a lady leaving her school this morning who looked like a hot mess, clothes way too small with way too much fat hanging out, hair looked like a mess, just in general someone that I wanted to say "um, you just brought your child to school, think you could cover up?" but as Jordann saw this lady she looked up at me with this look like "do you see that?" then looked at the ground with her little smirk on her face and shook her head. Shes proving everyday just how much she is my child. She also proving how much she's growing up because months ago she would have blurted out like any toddler would have about what is she wearing, or why didn't she get dressed etc. awwww my baby hahaha
love and thoughts with yall
Monday, May 12, 2014
Mommy day, wedding realizations
Well this was a different kind of mothers day for me. This was the first one in my entire life that I didn't see my sisters and I didn't see my mom. But the biggest void was not seeing Katie, I guess that's what I signed up for when I decided to move to Hutchinson away from them. It sure had a missing tone to it. But on Saturday Ciandra and Quintin finished their soccer seasons, Katie did amazing at her baton competition(taking home a trophy, as usual), Jordann had a soccer game and team pictures. We had a family picnic with the 6 kids here in between soccer games and just in general had a quiet, enjoyable day. That night 4 of the kids went with Scott and I to dinner and then it was pretty much bed time. I was pooped, sunburnt and worked at 9 the next morning. For y'all who know me, y'all understand that is way too early for me to function. That resulted in me being in bed about 9-9:30 that night.
Today I was off again(so nice to get these days off together) and was sitting here figuring out wedding details. I am so thankful to those people that have been willing to help us out with things like planning, venues, music, hair etc.. We are still struggling with a photographer, but I haven't given up on it. I have narrowed down my dress choices so I think ill be ordering it here in the next few weeks, aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh I cant believe the wedding is 5 months away. ALL decorations and food have been decided on. Music is still getting put together. And I still have to talk my Daddy into a funny dance. HAHA I think our girls and I are going to be doing a dance too but Meah and Ciandra are putting that together, so it should be really interesting. I am so blessed to have my girls willing to be with me on this day that I'm sure I will be a hot mess for.
As I sit across the room from Scott typing this and he is watching "Walker Texas Ranger" before going to work I have an overwhelming love for him and everything he does for us. He truly is heaven sent. He's still the same man he was and I'm still the same woman I was when we met 9 months ago, yet we are still so completely meshed that its soul soothing to be with him. Every minute away from him is a minute I miss him...well usually, some days he's a douche canoe and I want to throat punch him.... but usually I just miss him like crazy. HAHA
ok I gotta get to bed. Gotta get the kids to school, get Meah registered for volleyball camp and workout all before going to work at 10 tomorrow morning.
Much Love
Angie
Today I was off again(so nice to get these days off together) and was sitting here figuring out wedding details. I am so thankful to those people that have been willing to help us out with things like planning, venues, music, hair etc.. We are still struggling with a photographer, but I haven't given up on it. I have narrowed down my dress choices so I think ill be ordering it here in the next few weeks, aaaaahhhhhhhhhhh I cant believe the wedding is 5 months away. ALL decorations and food have been decided on. Music is still getting put together. And I still have to talk my Daddy into a funny dance. HAHA I think our girls and I are going to be doing a dance too but Meah and Ciandra are putting that together, so it should be really interesting. I am so blessed to have my girls willing to be with me on this day that I'm sure I will be a hot mess for.
As I sit across the room from Scott typing this and he is watching "Walker Texas Ranger" before going to work I have an overwhelming love for him and everything he does for us. He truly is heaven sent. He's still the same man he was and I'm still the same woman I was when we met 9 months ago, yet we are still so completely meshed that its soul soothing to be with him. Every minute away from him is a minute I miss him...well usually, some days he's a douche canoe and I want to throat punch him.... but usually I just miss him like crazy. HAHA
ok I gotta get to bed. Gotta get the kids to school, get Meah registered for volleyball camp and workout all before going to work at 10 tomorrow morning.
Much Love
Angie
Friday, May 9, 2014
First post
Just a quick note saying that I was forced to do this by my cousin and best friend, Nikki Pena!!
Tonight we had breakfast burritos for dinner for the first time. Now we are getting ready to have game night with the kids and eat cookies. :)
We don't get Fridays off together very often so this time is very important to us!
We plan to use this as a way to update everyone on the wedding plans, family events, and general ups and downs of being a blended family and newlyweds.
Love you all and thanks for stopping by!
Angie and Scott
Tonight we had breakfast burritos for dinner for the first time. Now we are getting ready to have game night with the kids and eat cookies. :)
We don't get Fridays off together very often so this time is very important to us!
We plan to use this as a way to update everyone on the wedding plans, family events, and general ups and downs of being a blended family and newlyweds.
Love you all and thanks for stopping by!
Angie and Scott
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